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Joke of the Day

"A mom sat down next to me at the park, smiled and asked, ""Which one's yours?"" I replied, ""None of them... yet."""

"""If you don't have anything nice to say, say as much as you can."" - the internet"

"Waiter there is a fly in my soup! Sorry sir maybe I've forgotten it when I removed the other three."

"What's the difference between a pick-pocket and a peeping tom? A pick-pocket snatches watches."

"What is the dumbest animal in the jungle? A polar bear"

"My girlfriend didn't like my penis at first... ... but then it grew on her."

"What do you call an epileptic in a garden? A seizure salad"

"How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but the light bulb has to want to change"

"pet owner's tip: glue the very tip of your cat's tail to the center of their back to make a convenient cat-carrying handle."

"It's way too early in the day for you to be yelling at me, repeating your demands, and making me follow you around, girl. It's over, Dora."