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Joke of the Day

"What did one ghost say to the other ghost? ""Do you believe in life before death?"""

"Dear Cupid, next time hit us both."

"How I want to die... I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather...not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car."

"Showier thoughts pt 3 Someone used this water to flush poop and now here I am washing my body with it."

"Not going to any more weddings or funerals. Please keep that in mind, friends who are considering getting married or dying."

"The restraining order doesn't mean we can't hang. It just says I can't get within 50ft of you. You wanna play catch or Frisbee or something?"

"I once knew a Johnny Glasscock in elementary school... You could always see him coming..."

"Why can't you fool an aborted baby? It wasn't born yesterday."

"Two white guys and a black guy go to the police station The two white guys return"

"Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key."