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Joke of the Day

"My mother told me if I dislike someine, I'd have to walk a mile in their shoes. That way, if they tried to get me, I'd be a mile away and they'd have no shoes."

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"Did you hear about that guy going around stealing everybody's Flamin' Hot Cheetos? He was caught red-handed! ...I'll see myself to the door."
"What was the pirate boxing champion known for? His left hook."
"""Chewing"" and ""eating"" are very similar things. But ""getting chewed out"" and ""getting eaten out"" are very different."
"What do you call a pedophile musician? A kiddy-fiddler"
"""we can put a man on the moon but ___________"" (insert issue that is vastly different)"
"How many Freudians does it take to change a lightbulb? Two: one to screw in the bulb and one to hold the ~~cock~~ ~~father~~ LADDER"
"An electrician comes home at 2 am.... His wife asks, ""wire you insulate?"" He replies, ""watt's the problem, I'm ohm aren't I?"""
"Jeb Bush should come out as being gay to get the Jewish vote. Jews have a strong record of listening to flaming bushes."
"What do you call a fake pasta? An impasta."
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