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Joke of the Day

"A man asks God... Man: ""Why did you make women so beautiful?"" God: ""So you would love her."" Man: ""Then why did you make her so dumb?"" God: ""So she would love you."""

"Today my girlfriend offered to finger me I was deeply touched."

"Why did the goose cross the road? Because he's an asshole."

"Did you hear about the man who burnt down a field full of beans? He really razed some pulses."

"Trump has so many failed businesses, if he wanted to shut down abortion clinics, he should have just put his name on one"

"Me: what do you want for breakfast? 7: a bowl of sugar Me too kid, me too"

"What do pizzas and blow jobs have in common... Even when there a bit shit, there still pretty fucking good."

"Lenin, Hitler, and Stalin were in a plane crash. Who was saved? The Russian people"

"An atheist, a vegan, and a Crossfitter walked into a bar... I only know because they told everyone within two minutes."

"Why do cows have hooves and not feet? Because they lactose."