213214

Joke of the Day

"Bono from U2 is the voice of my car's GPS It sucks. The streets have no names and I still haven't found what I'm looking for."

"My wife complains that I never open the car door for her, but when I do she's all, ""Stop it, you're driving too fast! We're on a bridge!"""

"What do you get when you cross Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris? Beat up."

"Fifth Third Bank? I don't think you understand how to number things, which is something I generally look for in a bank."

"I used to think an ocean of soda existed. Turns out it was just Fanta sea."

"Hilary Clinton and Donald Trump are on a ship when a rogue wave causes it to capsize. Who survives? America"

"How do you comfort a grammar nazi? ""There, they're, their."""

"I'm not only glad that toothpaste was invented I'm enamelled by it."

"Q: What is the only thing worse than an incompetent liberal President? A: A competent liberal President."

"A list of my favorite sex jokes. I don't have any..."