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Joke of the Day

"Stepping on a #LEGO sucks. But showing a bunch of kids I know how to use the F word as a noun/verb/adjective in one sentence is good, right?"

"My wife gets crazy when it comes to sex. I've had it with her."

"Yo momma so fat, ...she can't even be emotionally carried away."

"Ever hear about the worst international trade deal ever? It was tarifful..."

"I didn't know what to do with all the gifts my ex gave me. So I took antibiotics until they went away."

"Did you hear about the man who had sex with a parrot? He got chirpes, and the bad news is...it's untweetable."

"Do you know what one ocean said to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved. sea what i did there? I'm shore you got it come on, dont be a beach"

"Today I learned that diarrhea is hereditary. It runs through your ""jeans"""

"The first rule of fight club is don't hit hard I'm very sensitive"

"Q: How many blonde jokes are there? A: One - the rest are all true."