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Joke of the Day

"water Water Teacher: What is the formula for water? Student: H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O Teacher: That's not what I taught you. Student: But you said the formula for water was...H to O. l"

"Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Technically I pulled myself over, you only asked C: I know, right? They make us say it like that"

"How do you mute an Italian? Tie up their hands."

"Why was the dolphin so upset with the attendance of his drunken kegger? It lacked porpoise."

"Why is Xena never charged with any crime? Because she's Lucy Lawless"

"What do you call a girl who plays tennis on her knees? Courtney."

"In the future: ""So Zionists tried to take a people's home and said god gave it to them."" ""So what happened?"" ""Apparently god disagreed."""

"The more time passes since the movie ""Fight Club"" was released... ...the better we all are at following the first two rules of Fight Club."

"Some of these Giraffe profile pictures are a vast improvement."

"My family and I went to visit this new zoo that opened up recently but they only had a single canine there It was a shih tzu"