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Joke of the Day

"The reason I'm so happy today is because I got a penis enlarger... She's 18 years old!"

"Why does homemade bread not make your throat itch? It's made from scratch ^*NB ^OP ^is ^heckle-proof*"

"@funTweeters you guys are my favorite thing about Twitter. I suggest we get pant less and hug this out like men."

"Hypochondria? I think I have that!"

"Mom, i'm going out -You are not going out with that mini skirt. -But why? -Because they can see your balls, David."

"Before pulled pork, pork just used to stand on the edge of the dance-floor, nodding to the music and looking cool."

"Welcome to Religion, where everything's pretend and women don't matter"

"Why are magnets so arousing? They're very attractive."

"What happens when a fork and a spoon get into a fight? Civilwar!"

"LPT: When cooking chicken, it needs a lot of support Alone, it tastes absolutely fowl."