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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between a washing machine and a woman? A washing machine doesn't follow you around after you dump a load in it."

"Why wife accused em of being a transvestite... So I packed her things and left."

"Why did the hipster burn his fingers? because he changed the light bulb before it was cool"

"My short-term memory is not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my short-term memory's not as sharp as it used to be."

"Time machine jokes aren't funny, you guys. My great grandson dies in a time machine crash."

"Have you heard the joke about the baby with AIDS? It never gets old"

"A coworker just asked if I had any ""mouth water"" and I am thoroughly confused by this"

"*Runs 6 miles* *Adds Kenyan to resume*"

"What's gray and comes in quarts? According to my mom, my new stepdad"

"What's the cheapest cut of meat? Deer nuts: they're under a buck."