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Joke of the Day

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Adolf ! Adolf who ? Adolf ball hit me in the mouth !"

"They should make erasers for Crayons called ""Crayoffs""."

"[Job interview] Interviewer: Do you have any questions? Me: Who closes the door when the bus driver gets off the bus? Interviewer: Holy shit"

"""My brother's coming over for dinner."" Ugh, is he still talking only in country names? *brother walks in* ""Chad Hungary. Jamaica Turkey?"""

"Parliament should learn from Twitter, thousands of people shout here doing nothing productive, yet it never gets adjourned."

"What unit of measurement did the ancient greeks use to measure their crops? Demeter."

"if someone wakes up from a twenty year coma, i hope the first thing they see when they turn on a TV is mike tyson petting his pigeons."

"The Vatican got a huge internet bill this month... Apparently it's because of all the PDF files."

"I like my women how I like my coffee... Without a penis!"

"I had to pay $150 for the bowel prep medication before my colonoscopy. That shit was expensive. (Crosspost from r/funny. This fits better here.)"