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Joke of the Day

"Thank goodness for wide, paved road shoulders that important people like me are entitled to use during traffic jams."

"Why did the console peasant cross the road? To render buildings on the other side."

"Why couldn't the incontinent man print his documents? He couldn't Ctrl+P"

"What's one thing Lance Armstrong can still make money from? LIESTRONG bracelets."

"There was a mass shooting at the Gap store this afternoon. They're still counting the casual Tees."

"What is green and has wheels Grass. I lied about the wheels."

"Our dog is named lucky he often escapes, so we'll be up all night to get lucky"

"One day Jack was feeling happy.. Happy slapped him."

"Statically, 1 in every 10 people live next to a pedophile. Not me though, I live next to a little boy with a fat ass"

"A cowboy was shopping for a wiener dog some told him to get a long little doggy."