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Joke of the Day
"The 21st century: Deleting history is often more important than making it."
Next Joke
"My wife tried to lecture me about ""mansplaining""... ...but, as usual, she had it all wrong."
"Q: How do you know you're flying over Poland? A: Toilet paper hanging on the clotheslines."
"Are we sure the wise men who brought frankincense and myrrh weren't just trying to sign Mary up for their essential oils pyramid scheme?"
"Happy International Women's day. Or a sad one. Or an angry one. Or a passive aggressive one. You never really know with women."
"where did Mary go after the explosion?! EVERYWHERE!"
"Miley Cyrus down at the post office lickin all the stamps. Mail lady says they're not even that kind of stamp anymore but Miley doesn't stop"
"What's the difference between a Zippo and a Hippo? One is heavy, and one is a little lighter"
"*strums ukulele* This one goes out to my ex wife, Lucy. It's called ""I know how much you hate ukuleles so I wrote a 9 minute ukulele song"""
"Day 20. Still lost at sea. Crew thinks I know how to plot a course with a protractor. I just like making it walk on the map. Pointy Leg Man."