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Joke of the Day

"Every time I fold laundry I contemplate becoming a nudist. Then I remember what I look like naked and keep folding...."

"Help I'm addicted to skin I can't stop wearing it!"

"What disease do horses fear most? Hay Fever!"

"Let's simplify this. Deliver a pizza to me every night unless I call."

"Every day, I hope I don't get bitten by a spider. I'm not afraid of spiders, I just don't want the responsibility of being a superhero."

"How many mexicans does it take to build a house in.... Shit he's done"

"Why is trigonometry so hard to talk about? You always end up going off onto tangents."

"What's the best gift you can buy at Christmas? A broken drum, you can't beat it."

"A fish swims into a brick wall... Damn."

"Yo mama's so fat... ...when she died, she had to be preserved in formalda-wide. She then had to be whipped creamated. If she wasn't, they would have had to given her an open-graveyard funeral."