200627

Joke of the Day

"Husband: Why are there broken condoms on the couch? Wife: Would you please call our children by their names!?"

"Did you hear about the protestors killing the circus? They went straight for the juggler."

"24 astronauts were born in Ohio. What is about your state that makes people want to flee the Earth?"

"What's the difference... What's the difference between a chef and a perverted aquarium owner? One fixes dishes and the other dicks his fishes."

"They are making gluten free communion wafers now. I guess you eat them because they represent the beach-body of Christ."

"I went up to Serena Williams. I said, ""Serena, what's your favourite planet?"" She said, ""It's Venus."" I said, ""Oh sorry, Venus, what's your favourite planet?"""

"Why don't astronauts take anything seriously? They don't grasp the gravity of the situation..."

"Mouldy sausage? What is green and smells like pork? Kermits finger."

"What does a gay Kraken eat? *Seamen*"

"Wow you changed your makeup in 16 different hot ways. And where did you learn those 8 moves that drove me wild *sees Cosmo on the table* ah"