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Joke of the Day

"If life was easy it would be called... Your Mom."

"I picked up a hitchhiker. You gotta when you hit them."

"I reported my bike stolen, now the thief can't use it anymore. Since the police is on it."

"Business idea Souvernir Shops in abortion clinics - so noone leaves empty handed"

"Q: What algorithm did Intel use in the Pentium's floating point divider? A: ""Life is like a box of chocolates..."" (Source: F. Gump of Intel)"

"What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher? One minds the train the other trains the mind."

"I just saw a documentary about how ships are held together. Riveting."

"Breastfeeding your infant is important. But what about the wings and thighs? Should I just leave the whole KFC bucket in the crib?"

"Liven up any boring conversation by telling people you have a glass eye and then watch them try and figure out which one it is."

"Hooker to customer: ""I will do anything for you for $500"". Customer says incredulously: ""ANYTHING?"" Hooker: ""Sure"" Customer: ""Meet me at my house on Friday, I want you to -"" ""paint my house."""