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Joke of the Day

"Why do southern girls get pregnant so much more than northern girls? Because it takes them so much longer to say ""Kaaa-WIT!"""

"Rick Astley will let you have any movie from his Disney collection except one He's never gonna give you Up"

"Why is Nixon a bad chef? Because he is not a cook."

"Computers are like old testament gods. Lots of rules and no mercy. Not mine, got it somewhere on the internet."

"What's the difference between a corn shucker with epilepsy and a whore with diarrhea? The corn shucker shucks between fits..."

"What happens when you play the drums incorrectly? You get repercussions"

"Insert racist joke here... Change location of joke to Ferguson."

"Two guys walked into a bar... The other guy ducked."

"Person 1: ""Have you seen that new movie about the tractor?"" Person 2: ""No, but the trailer looks good."""

"If you're afraid of elevators Take steps to avoid them."