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Joke of the Day

"5-year-old: Dad, can you make the rain go away? Me: Someone more powerful than me controls the weather. 5-year-old: Me: 5-year-old: Mom?"

"How do you know when your best friend is gay? When his dick tastes like shit"

"How do you fit 100 babies into a cup? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips."

"What is the difference between a dog and a fox? About 5 drinks"

"Then there was the guy who fell into a vat of molten optical glass afterdrinking too much. Just two glasses, and look what a spectacle he made ofhimself."

"Why was General Yoda afraid of April? Because March, April May."

"What is Niglish? You're an asshole. Just go away."

"I renamed my night club Viagra... It's been 4 hours and people are still cuming!"

"Two elderly couple who have Alzheimers just finished having sex Male : Was it good? Female : I can't remember Male : Who are you? Sorry for the formatting sent this via my phone"

"There are two types of people in the world. Those that categorize people into two types and those who don't."