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Joke of the Day

"A female is like an AP free response question She asks question A, B, C, and D and implanted in all Are questions i, ii, and iii."

"My sex face is the same as my first pee in three hours face."

"Why do black guy's eyes get red after sex. mace"

"[Army Shooting Range] Officer: Are you locked & loaded? Soldiers: YES SIR! Officer: You may fire at will! Soldier Named Will: WTF?"

"What do you call an Asian person that is hit by a car? Hood orient"

"Poor Bob Holness Only been at the pearly gates five minutes, when Amy Winehouse stumbles over and asks 'can I have an E please Bob'."

"Q: Why can't you hear a viola on a digital recording? A: Recording technology has reached such an advanced level of development that all extraneous noise is eliminated."

"Why did the aliens choose to not invade and enslave the human race? Because they're not garbage collectors."

"What should you do if you find a witch in your bed? Run!"

"A tree was knocked down by a recent storm... and destroyed an African family's home. The thing is, we didn't even know they lived up there!"