193040

Joke of the Day

"This morning, 2 evangelists knocked on the door selling Jesus. If they would've thrown in a Slap Chop, I would've been sold."

"Sure I get excited when he unzips his pants. I'm pretending it's the sound of his body bag."

"""With great power, comes great responsibility"" - - Melania Trump"

"Why is Hillary running for President? Because it's easier than running from the law."

"By all means, get married. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher."

"I went to a large bookstore ... ... and asked the lady at the counter, where the self-help section was. She said if she would tell me, it would defeat the very purpose of it."

"Why did the Baker keep going to the ATM? He kneaded the dough"

"Time travelers never have a good excuse for being late."

"Two medical students are about to witness an autopsy for the first time... One asks the other, ""What do you think it'll be like?"" The other student shrugs and says, ""Remains to be seen""."

"Why does a Frenchman never eat more than one egg at breakfast? (for those linguistically aware Redditors among you) Because one egg is un oeuf"