191408

Joke of the Day

"The England Football team..... visited a Brazilian orphanage this morning. 'It's heartbreak to see their sad little faces with no hope' said Jose, age 6."

"Bernie Sanders If I had a nickel for every time a redditor posted about something Bernie Sanders, I'd be the kind of person he is always smearing. A BILLIONAIRE!"

"I dunno why people say hurtful things like... ""Wanna go for a run?"" or ""Try this kale."""

"Q. How are husbands like lawn mowers? A. They're hard to get started they emit noxious odours and half the time they don't work."

"A pirate walls into a bar And he has a ships wheel attached to his belt buckle. The bartender says ""what's with the ships wheel on your belt buckle?"" The pirate responds ""Aaarr! It's drivin me nuts!"""

"I'm convinced. Some peoples' brains are still on dial-up."

"They say you can't skip leg day Ironically it is because of leg day that you can't skip."

"[describing a chair] it's like a swing without all the drama"

"Give a girl an inch and she'll want the other 6 too"

"Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump Are Sinking On A Cruise Ship, Who Survives? America"