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Joke of the Day

"I keep making jokes about my dads new Thai bride. He's getting pretty sick of them. My dads getting sick of them too."

"Today was so terrible, I thought Steven Seagal was in it."

"So a man says to a woman, can I smell your vagina? Horrified, she slaps him and screams ""NO""! He rubs his cheek and says, ""I guess it must be your feet then."""

"What do you call a Spanish matador who is not very good at his job? I'd say he's fairly incapa**bull**."

"Poop jokes aren't my absolute favorite kinds of jokes. But they're a solid #2."

"So my math teacher asked what I did over Thanksgiving... (-1)/8"

"My favorite word is plagiarism. I invented that word."

"I asked my trainer ""Which machine at the gym should I use to impress beautiful women?"" He pointed outside and said ""The ATM machine"" [ c/o /u/jubileo5 ]"

"My girlfriend is in Mexico for vacation and if she has a Juan night stand while she's down there, her and I are totally done."

"I like my women like how I like my coffee beans Ground and stored in the freezer."