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Joke of the Day

"Why did the belt get arrested? Because it held up a pair of pants. I'll show myself out."

"I WON'T STAND FOR THIS IDIOCY! *sits* Ok, proceed."

"Being bald It means you went back to your roots."

"Why did the Vampire's girlfriend break up with him? Because he was pain in the neck!"

"I made two New Year's resolutions: my first is to stop procrastinating I'll make my second one later"

"Getting directions from Donald Trump is a lot like checking the hour on an analogue clock Always pay attention to where the little hand is pointing"

"Non-Americans may get this. Waterboarded."

"I have HIV Hair is vanishing"

"What do you call a muslim crocodile? An Allahgator!"

"I hate horror movies where everything goes back to normal at the end. You just had a demon inside you, but yeah, let's go for pancakes."