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Joke of the Day

"Harry potter is the story of a troubled kid.... ...dealing what what an older man did to him in his bedroom as a child."

"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? You don't know...? Oh.. Man, that's lame."

"What's better than roses on a piano? Tulips on an organ!"

"Why did the naughty child not get electrocuted when he stuck a fork in the socket? Because he was grounded! (I'll see myself out)"

"What language do Fed-Ex drivers speak? Parcel-tongue"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, I kicked the piece of shit before it did."

"Was told to fuck bitches and get money. All I got was charged with bestiality"

"Butcher A man in a butcher shop: ""I would like bull testicles please"" Butcher: ""Me too"""

"What's easier to pick up the heavier it gets? Women."

"Did Jesus ever get drunk? I dunno either, but I heard he got hammered once."