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Joke of the Day

"I got arrested at the airport last week. Appearently security doesn't like it when you call shotgun before boarding the plane."

"What does a vampire with a weight problem drink? Blood light"

"What do Lewinsky, Monroe, and Reddit have in common? They all went down on a President."

"Have you ever seen the movie called ""Constipated""? Well it never came out."

"Every day, there's a kid coming to my store looking for trouble... And every day, I tell him we're sold out. Can't he buy Monopoly instead?"

"Drugs are a crazy thing What did jerry Garcia say to Bob weir when they ran out of drugs? Man this music sucks!"

"Have you guys heard the story about the butter? You know what, never mind. I don't want to spread it around."

"What is the best part of living in Flint You get free Orange Juice"

"What's the difference between a musician and a large cheese pizza? A large cheese pizza can feed a family of four."

"Girl, we can play zoo..and you can tame my monkey"