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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a green cow in a field? Invisibull."
Next Joke
"5% of America thinks we're doing well. The other 95% thinks we could do gooder."
"Two cannibals were eating a clown.... One turns to the other and asks, ""Hey, does this taste funny to you?"""
"You never realize what you have till its gone... Toilet paper is a good example."
"I hope all the friends I've made in the bathroom at 1am are still SO pretty and everything worked out with that boy they were drunk texting"
"Being successful is like being pregnant.. ..Everybody congratulates you, but nobody knows how many times you've been fucked."
"As a quiet and skinny person, I feel like we should charge loud and fat people more to ride the subway. It won't be difficult to implement either. All we would need to do is charge them by volume."
"Why'd the semen cross the road? I wore the wrong pair of socks."
"I realized that my parents can be proud of my strict upbringing when I tripped and fell down the whole staircase shouting ""OUCH, OUCH! It hurts!""."
"What state do most people live in? Denial. Myself included."