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Joke of the Day

"Mushroom walks into a bar and orders a drink. BARTENDER: We dont serve your kind round' here. MUSHROOM: Why not I'm a fun-gai. I'll see my way out, thanks."

"I love pteradons They're my favorite dinosoars."

"Racism is 1/10 But it's 7/10 with Tamir Rice"

"What kind of bees produce milk? booBEES. I'm so sorry.."

"Reality T.V. Show Idea: Put The Kardashians, Honey Boo Boo, and the Jersey Shore cast on a island. Have them fight it out until the last one stands and call it ""Who Gives A Fuk"""

"This is an emergency! *Begs to borrow strangers phone *starts scrolling through pics"

"Judging by how all of these ladies tweet about cucumbers I'm pretty sure size does matter because I never see them tweeting about carrots :("

"How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Look for fresh Prince"

"Why do no communists drink Earl Grey tea? Because all proper tea is theft."

"If you tell me I can only have sex with your sister over your dead body, your funeral is going to be awkward for some of your family."