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Joke of the Day

"Commentator just said that the rain ""may just be the tears of a heartbroken nation,"" which shows a fundamental misunderstanding of rain."

"Bert is walking with Albert through the park and says, ""I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith."" Albert says, ""What's the name of his other leg?"""

"If you surround yourself with people who are full of drama, don't bitch if a shitstorm is always blowing through your life."

"How do you use a philosophy degree in a professional context? *Why* would you like fries with that?"

"What's the smartest piece of lab equipment? A graduated cylinder."

"What was Hitler's favorite letter? I have no idea, but it was probably NOT Z."

"What do you get when you squeeze a synagogue? Fresh Jews."

"We all missed harambe Except the bullet!"

"What do you call it when a white person robs you? Capitalism."

"I'm on hold. My call is important to them."