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Joke of the Day

"I came in second at a Monica Lewinsky look alike competition. . . . . . the judge said I was close, but no cigar."

"Why did the Seahawks win the 2015 NFC Championship game against the Packers? Because even Aaron Rodgers is a 12!"

"Any salad can be a Caesar salad. If you stab it enough."

"Q: Why is Bill Clinton diverting federal funds from improving schools to improving jails? A: Because when his term is through he won't be going to school."

"Donald Trump and Hilary Clinton are stranded on a boat in the middle of the ocean... Who survives? America."

"What's the difference between a pizza and a prostitute? You can order one of them without mushrooms."

"Oprah just came out with a line of vibrators They're called ""the O""."

"Bill Cosby played running back at Temple University. They were a real sleeper this season finishing 10-3."

"Where do Chicago football fans buy engagement rings? De Beers"

"Scented toilet paper girlfriend: is this toilet paper scented? Me: I'm not sure; my asshole doesn't smell so good"