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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a divorce and a tornado in the south? Nothing. Either way someone is going to lose a trailer"

"Yeah, conservatives. I will marry a dog. I'll marry 12 dogs. I'm a dog mormon now."

"There's always an Obama in relationships. The one that has to compromise, doesn't really get much credit, and never wins, no matter what."

"Do you remember that barbecue? You know, the one where I put my meat on your grill?"

"Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but I hear the reception was excellent."

"What is hot, carbon-dated and buried deep inside Georgia? Her geography teacher's cock."

"One day I'll pretend to be gay. I'll make lots of female friends, gain their trust. Become their confidant, and when they least expected...BAAM!!! I'll fuck their boyfriends"

"Amazon Review: A History of Criminals Not a bad book. Prose and cons."

"Chuck Norris crab fishes the Bearing Sea using only a snorkel and a laundry basket."

"Wife: Could you be dehydrated? Me: Of course not. W: How much water have you had? Me: Two coffees & a bourbon. W: Wow. Me: Told you."