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Joke of the Day

"I'm not saying it's been a while, but, the last time a girl got down on her knees for me, she showed me how to tie my shoelaces."

"I get suicidal when I play guitar So I don't fret about it Sorry [8]"

"An electrical engineer is talking to a blonde the blonde asks: ""What do you do for a living?"" The engineer replies "" I make chips"" ""Oh yummy!"""

"I just bought the best vacuum ever It sucks"

"Eric Garner tried stand up comedy... But he choked on stage."

"Doctor Griffith offers both Veterinary and Taxidermy services. His tag line is ""Either way, you get your pet back""."

"He was a satyr boy She said see you later boy He wasn't goat enough for her"

"There should be a massage parlor where when you ask for a ""happy ending"" your dad walks out and says that he's proud of you."

"What do you call a cross between an elephant and a rhino? 'Ell if i know."

"Hey guys I just discovered something... It's called Christopher Columbus. I later robbed and killed him."