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Joke of the Day

"FIRMS YOU'VE NEVER HEARD OF OFFERING SERVICES YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND AT PRICES THEY REFUSE TO DISCUSS."

"I wouldn't take a bullet for you but I'd definitely push someone in front of you to take it for you. Same thing."

"How do you make a snooker table laugh? Put your hands in its pockets & tickle its balls."

"Whats the best time to go to the dentist? 4:30pm It let's you out of work a bit early with a valid excuse"

"Why did the campfire turn into a forest fire? It wanted to get off its ash."

"If the Hulk worked in the produce section of Kroger... would he be a Green Grocer?"

"I hope 2016 doesn't get renewed. The plot is ridiculous and none of the characters are likable."

"*offers dog a treat* Dog: I have a boyfriend"

"I heard Apple is designing a new automatic car But they're having trouble installing windows"

"I couldn't find my mustache for a week It was right under my nose the entire time."