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Joke of the Day

"I saw a lady texting and driving today... I was furious. I rolled down my window, and threw my beer at her."

"Girl: Did you like that cake Mrs Jones? Mrs Jones: Yes very much. Girl: That's funny. My mom said you didn't have any taste."

"What do you call a fruit that won't get married? A Cantaloupe."

"I asked my soap who it voted for, it said... I'd lather not say! note: This one came to me in the shower just now, gotta go back in now. Oh, the irony! I think. ~Skip"

"Why is the LSU football team like my car? They both used to have Les (less) Miles!"

"Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life."

"Damn boy, are you the black jelly bean? Because I absentmindedly picked you, and now I regret having you in my mouth."

"Good thing ""you only live once"" has really caught on otherwise we might all kill ourselves like it's no big deal"

"Which dances do the burgers do best? The burger-loo and the char char!"

"What is French Super Mario's favorite board game? Le Ouija"