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Joke of the Day

"UNGRATEFUL GIRLFRIEND I swear that I have the most ungrateful girlfriend in the world. Every time I give her an orgasm.......she spits it out"

"I went to the zoo the other day, all they had was a small dog. It was a shit-zoo."

"Ex-lax Did you know that all boxes of Ex-lax have been recalled? You can't buy Ex-lax anywhere. Really..I'm not shittin'."

"You're IQ's lower than your shoe size."

"What's the difference between Santa Claus and the Jews? Santa goes *down* the chimney."

"What do you say about a man with premature ejaculation and severe diarrhea? Easy come; easy go."

"2 monkeys in the bath. One says to the other... ""Ooh ah ah ah uh uh ooh ah ah ah ah aaah"" The other says... ""Do you want me to put some more cold in?"""

"Q: Why should you never run in front of a bus? A: You will get tired."

"What is the favorite saying of a police officer in the Simpsons? If it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown shoot it down."

"Yes, I said I was sorry and that I'd do anything to win you back. But that was before you told me you needed a ride to the airport at 5am."