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Joke of the Day

"Scotland's Independence David Cameron has said Scotland could become a third world country if they become independent. I'm not sure if things will improve to that degree, but you never know"

"Welcome to Business Job. Squeeze my hand and I'll squeeze yours. There, now we're acquaintances. Here's your 3 walls and chair."

"You kill vegetarian vampires with a steak to the heart."

"So 3 mods and a user walk into a bar [deleted]"

"People with a good sense of humor have a better sense of life."

"Smoking is actually a good thing for me Look how often I have to go outside into the fresh air"

"Hey dude! Would we be considered in-laws if I slept with your wife? No... we'd be even."

"After some thinking i decided not to go through with the brain transplant But then, i changed my mind"

"Why do the Japs like Sony? Because they made the Playstasian"

"I've decided I'll never get down to my original weight I'm okay with that. After all, 6lbs, 3oz, is just not realistic."