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Joke of the Day

"Im trying to get into classical music... ...but I cant find any original recordings. All the music is performed by cover bands."

"What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he got asked to play in a film about classic composers? I'll be Bach."

"What does an impatient cow say? Mooove the fuck out my way"

"I just saw a baby wearing a shirt saying: ""Santa doesn't exist, but that's ok, cause I can't read."""

"Dear Fruity Pebbles: Calorie content w/out milk is unnecessary. Anyone shoving dry Fruity Pebbles down their throat isn't counting calories."

"If you jump off a bridge in Paris... You are in seine"

"I now know I'm getting old. I was watching some porn the other day and thought to myself wow that's a nice bed."

"Bruce Willis... Bruce Willis will probably keep making action movies. Because, you know what they say about old habits..."

"what's your plan for this rap battle? ""just keep rhyming his name till he can't recover"" dope, here he comes *in walks a giant orange*"

"Babies cry so that we can remember where we left them."