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Joke of the Day
"If Mississippi wears her New Jersey, what does Delaware? I dunno, Alaska."
Next Joke
"What's the difference between a lentil and a chick pea? I won't pay $200 to have a lentil on my face."
"I like women how I like my eggs... Whites only"
"32nd rule of Fight Club is no peanut products are allowed at Fight Club"
"I just got a job helping a one arm typist do capital letters... Its shift work."
"i want the first line of my obituary to be about how i once used an umbrella three different times before losing it"
"The waiter came up to my table and said, ""Can I take your order?"" I said, ""Sure."" He said, ""Thanks, I'm just really hungry."""
"3 1/2 Inches is the avg size a woman needs to be happy. MasterCard, Visa, American Express, ect..."
"Why the fuck do babies enjoy being thrown in the air? How terrifying would it be if a giant repeatedly tossed you above their head?"
"When is the Speech Therapy Class? It's hard to say."