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Joke of the Day

"I told a girl she would look better with her hair back and she got really offended. Chemo patients are so sensitive."

"Most computer problems stem from the lack of a fatherboard. No? Ok, I'll show myself out."

"Who will take the second shot in this snooker game? Find out after the break."

"Why was the vampire's girlfriend mad at him? Because she couldn't finish her sentences. Why couldn't she finish her sentences? He kept eating her periods."

"What do you call three Make-a-Wish Foundation kids? A genie."

"The joke is on you, fruit flies. We don't even have any fruit."

"What's the most musical part of a fish? Its scales."

"""911 whats your emerge-"" I THOUGHT I COULD TAKE THESE PANTS OFF WITHOUT TAKING OFF MY SHOES"

"My ex just called me, sobbing on the phone to tell me she has AIDS and I should get checked. The hardest part is acting surprised."

"I think my girlfriend has a trigonometry fetish because every time I talk to her she gets off on a tangent."