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Joke of the Day

"What do necrophiliacs get at funerals? Mourning wood."

"Hi, welcome to dating. These are your two options:1. Stay together forever2. Break upNo pressure."

"Parenting Hack: slide a little cash your kid's teacher's way, & all of his crafts projects will ""mysteriously"" disappear after being graded."

"What do you call a Dothraki mathematician? Khal-culator."

"Last week I walked up to Wayne Rooney at the airport and said,""How about an autograph mate?"" ""Sure."" He replied. So I signed a photo print of myself and gave it to him."

"My wife has just left me, taking my satellite dish and Bob Marley collection. No woman, no Sky."

"My son asked me what's it like being married. I said ""You know how you have to eat your vegetables to get dessert? Like that""."

"You can lead a horse to water but it's pretty crowded there because of all the men you taught to fish in that other proverb."

"How does the vicar explore the Internet? With the church mouse."

"What tribe is your bicep from?"