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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a Golden Chihuahua and a Golden Shower? You never have to pay before the dog'll pee on you."

"What do asparagus and anal sex have in common? The more it's forced on you as a child, the more you dislike it as an adult."

"Is that a Nexus 6 or are you just happy to see me?"

"What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? Flatbread"

"I've just been to a concert put on by the Bermuda philharmonic orchestra. Half way through, the guy on the triangle disappeared."

"I like my women like I like my cars Black, loud, heavy, and full of gas."

"Did you hear about the woman who was shot 24 times in the back?! They say she got up afterwards, putting her clothes back on, and exclaimed ""Wow, your reload time is *amazing*!"""

"A bald man was once presented with a comb as a gift... He said, ""I'll never part with it."""

"Miley Cyrus's VMA preformance... Was so classless Karl Marx came in his grave"

"If I ever get a llama, I'm totally naming it Dalai."