17550

Joke of the Day

"what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? gang rape"

"GF asked me last night ""Do you even know why I like cherry coke??"" ""...because it's so delicious."""

"How do you get a polar bear in the water? First, you cut a hole in the ice, then you sprinkle some pees around the hole. When the polar bear goes to take a pee, you kick him in the ice hole!"

"Why can't people in wheelchairs be looked at for too long? The can't handle stares."

"Arnold Schwarzenegger's computer Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 8, he replied: ""I still love Vista, baby"""

"""I am not a human garbage disposal"" *eats leftover mac n cheese anyway* *makes terrible grinding noise after accidentally swallowing fork*"

"Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because Bill threw a mattress at him."

"If you take the D out of Devil what do you get? the D"

"I can make you speak even MORE Irish. Say this five times fast: ""Your fork can eat jet."""

"Why do women wear white on their wedding day? All good kitchen appliances come in white. (Don't hurt me)"