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Joke of the Day

"Last night I got a handjob from a blind girl She said, ""You've got the biggest dick I've ever put my hands on."" I said, ""nah, you're just pulling my leg."""

"Being poor means having to read the menu card from right to left."

"If I had a dollar for every gender... I'd have $2 and some monopoly money..."

"Bob: Women always call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor."

"What side of the chicken has the most feathers? The Outside!"

"How does a _____ (insert race, occupation, etc. ) find his goat in tall grass? Very satisfying"

"What did the school in Egypt finally get? A new bus."

"Mermaids: Can't live with them, can't beat them in a potato sack race."

"Air conditioning? Not a fan"

"What's the difference between a rooster and your mom? A rooster says, ""cockadoodledoo"". Your mom says, ""anycockwilldoo""."