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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a person whose wife was the Queen, daughter is a Princess and his boss is the Emperor, but he himself is no royal? Darth Vader."

"This census and Tax stuff is crap. I want to live in a country that doesn't assign homework."

"What should you do if you find an angry 500-pound dog in your kitchen? Eat out."

"What's the worst part about shaking a one-armed man? You know that's his masturbating hand"

"The only problem with shopping online is that you can't sit on a bench in the mall and judge everyone else who walks by."

"My girlfriend and I play a game where we see who can yell rape the loudest while having sex. She doesn't know we play it but she still wins every time."

"There should be an MtF superhero group. They would be the Ex-Men."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Brie ! Brie who ? Brie me my supper !"

"Arnold Schwarzenegger has made a pretty good career for himself in pest control... They say he's a great ex-terminator"