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Joke of the Day

"[intercom] Please stop putting clown shoes on the sacrificial goat. The ritual is in 3 days & the other cults aren't taking us seriously."

"What do you call a group of spoiled children? The government"

"What is a cannibal's favourite treat? A kid kat. (My 9 year old son made this up.)"

"I've been sexually frustrated ever since my girlfriend left with the broken fan. Who's going to blow me now?"

"she like a man in uniform so the mcdonalds outfit here 2 stay"

"Crazy episode of Judge Judy on right now. This guy was a month late on his rent and she just gave him the electric chair."

"I left my girlfriend because she lost an ear It may sound shallow but I take my corn seriously"

"TIL that AIDS can be caused by anal sex... As In Doggie Style"

"Why does Santa have a large sack? Because he only cums once a year"

"Your momma's so fat . . . She has to lift up the toilet seat to take a shit."