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Joke of the Day
"Who was the world's first carpenter? Eve. She made Adam's banana stand"
Next Joke
"Where did the gay Wizard go? He disappeared with a poof."
"I wear Lacoste shirts with the little crocodile on them because when shit goes down I want crocodiles to know that I'm on their side."
"Bought a cat collar with a bell on it, and now I can't sneak up on the cat to put it on her."
"I really wish I knew who kicked the jack under the car which I was working on.. .. the suspension is killing me."
"So it's the first day of shop class... The teacher asks, ""What's the difference between a nail, a screw, and a bolt?"" A girl raises her hand and says, ""I don't know. I've never been bolted before."""
"So this guy comes in a smokeshop. No wait! A horse! So this guy comes in a horse"
"Q: Why can't blondes put in light bulbs? A: They keep breaking them with the hammers."
"Hi, I'm a zombie, can I eat you out?"
"[Club] Me: *has debilitating crush on a nerd* Nerd: What you feel is a burst of norepinephrine increasing arousal and focus- Me: *swoons*"