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Joke of the Day

"You said it was a great horse and it is. It took twenty other horses to beat him!"

"Ugh I hate the bathroom at this mall. There's not a single urinal. Just a bunch of women screaming."

"What's an archaeologist's favorite verb? Bone."

"Did you hear about that actress that got stabbed the other day? What was her name, Reese... > Witherspoon? No, it was with a knife."

"[cops knock on my door] ""Sir?"" ""Nobody's home."" ""Who said that then?"" ""My dog."" ""Jesus Christ, well do u know when Mr Hughes will be back?"""

"I was going to join the debating team in high school, but someone talked me out of it."

"What do you call an Asian man with one leg? Tai-Wan-Shu"

"Did you hear about the girl who was dating the Berlin Wall? Things were going well, but it broke up."

"You want to know what's the most unrealistic thing from Batman V superman? (not a spoiler) A democratic senator from Kentucky."

"Jack the lad at work came out with this one today... What's the difference between 3 dicks and a joke? Your mom can't take a joke.."