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Joke of the Day
"What is a mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country"
Next Joke
"The Minnesota Twins have just signed Adrian Peterson to a 3 year deal. More details to come. All we know is Adrian will be a switch hitter."
"Thieves .. Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap,shower gel,towels and deodorant.Dirty Bastards."
"""Today's special is a grilled Chilean sea bass with white wine reduction. We recommend Instagramming it with the 1977 or Apollo filters..."""
"A group of mountain climbers once heard Father Christmas go past. They must have had sharp ears! They were mountain-ears!"
"Why don't people in their 80's have sex anymore? You ever try to open a grilled cheese sandwich?"
"People seem very hopeful about the news of water in Mars. But I take it with a grain of salt."
"I'm going to throw an awesome surprise party for my daughter when she gets home and realizes I know that she snuck out! SURPRISE!"
"Do you know what indefinitely means? Well, if you're nuts are slapping against her ass, then you're in........ definitely"
"There are tons of girls in my software engineering class... ...just not very many of them."