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Joke of the Day

"Would an unfulfilled beer ad bikini model... be known as a sadder Budweiser girl?"

"What do you call a disputatious horse? A naahh sayer. Credit:14 yr old me."

"Some people tell me I have a superiority complex. But it's actually pretty simple. They're just too dumb to comprehend it."

"What must a policeman have before searching a rabbits' home? A search warren!"

"Teenage son gets academic honors every year in school, yet he can't cut a straight line with a lawnmower. I believe I am being played......"

"Always check the height of nearby ceiling fans before giving a toddler a ride on your shoulders. How I learned this rule is not important."

"In my youth, there was no ""snapschapts"". If you liked a young lady, you'd draw a proper picture of your genitals and send it to her parents."

"1) Open a Kinkos style office supply store in Bel Air 2) Name it Fresh Prints 3) Make millions 4) Move to West Philadelphia"

"I have an awful lot of shampoo and conditioner for a single bald dude"

"Why should you never go drinking if you wear a monocle? Because then you'd be a barnacle."