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Joke of the Day

"I just read that Stevie Wonder is filing for divorce. I guess in the end, they just didn't share the same views!"

"I like how Subway sells ""healthy footlong"" sandwiches, as if anything is healthy when you're eating it by the foot."

"Do you know the difference between a cheeseburger and a blowjob? (No- what?) Want to get lunch sometime?"

"Why did the pedophile go into the cave? He was looking for miners."

"It's a joke, not a dick. Don't take it so hard."

"My Dad got a Chia Obama head a couple of years ago. The box said he would grow an afro, but nothing changed."

"My wife asked me to load the dishwasher. So I poured her some shots and told her to start drinking. And that's how the fight started."

"Guy [beating me up for making a joke at an inappropriate time]: whos funny now you piece of shit Me: wait, you thought i was funny before?"

"What do you tell a cow blocking a road? Mooove"

"What did the constipated mathematician do? He worked his problems out with a pencil and paper."