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Joke of the Day

"Hillary was shown a video of her flip-flopping on issues all over her career. At first, she was upset. Now she says she's ok with it."

"There are two types of countries on this planet ones that use the metric system and the one that got to the moon"

"If a man says something in the middle of a forest and there is no women around to hear him is he still wrong?"

"How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? Tenants."

"Hey girls, you are not a ""mommy"" just because you own a dog. You have to have a kid to be a mommy. If you are a mommy, then I am a dragon."

"I just finished an exciting book on 19th century shipbuilding techniques... It was riveting."

"Never trust an atom They make up everything"

"I rustle jimmies look at my name lol"

"The problem with teaching a man to fish is that eventually somebody will microwave that fish in the work break room."

"What do you call someone who is iffy about cleaning lawn games? A wishy-washy Washer washer."