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Joke of the Day
"Why did the comedian go to the dog pound? To work on his put-downs."
Next Joke
"Cop: Know why I stopped u? ""Cuz im going too fast?"" Cop: Yes, slow down. ""But it's been 6 months-"" Cop: U can't move in with her yet."
"When playing Fuck/Marry/Kill always ask yourself: will my ""marry"" be cool w/ me fucking & killing these other people?"
"what happened when the frog double parked? Its car got toad away."
"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance... We'll see about that."
"I'd like to tell you I can keep you safe Son but lets be realistic here, we're dealing with a closet that has a God damn monster in it."
"""Nobody move!"" - 19th century photographer"
"Give me your best pun and I will put them in the despiption."
"What should you do if there is a blackout at night? Call the police, they'll come and shoot it."
"Pamela Anderson turns 43 today but her tits are barely old enough to buy a drink in this city."